Modern pet play has its roots in degradation scenes in BDSM. Treating someone like an animal makes them lower than humans — in rights, in power, and in stature. But it also means they are free to worry less and play more. Headspace provides benefits to pet players and creates relationships that can be challenging to navigate. In this episode, I present a discussion that confronts those challenges head-on.
Back in September 2019, I presented “The Power of Headspace” at Florida Power Exchange. We chatted about how to negotiate and signify power dynamics within pet play. Along the way, learned how to properly greet a canine, how to kick yourself out of headspace (no, it’s not like Inception), and what you really need to negotiate before starting a pet-play scene.
If you want to follow along as we go (sort of), you can view and comment on my notes from the talk. Keep in mind that we followed the natural conversation more than we stuck to the outline. The discussion and the document don’t always align.
Speaking of Negotiating…
If you heard the previous episode, “Healthy Headspace,” you heard me say a few things back in January 2019 that I no longer accept. Specifically, I claimed that critters can’t negotiate while in headspace. I was wrong. They can, they should, and they must do it carefully. We touch on those subjects a bit in this conversation. Mostly we emphasize ways to prepare for a scene and phrase questions during. But there’s a lot more to talk about on that subject.
In our next episode, I’ll interview Topher/Pup Otter about social situations in which negotiations are essential — and often overlooked. This group discussion makes a great introduction to what we’ll talk about next time.